If all I have left is a single breath in my lungs, let it be my song to sing

I surrender.

Let no desire for fame or beauty
Being seen but not truly
Roads that lead to nothing really
Keep me from saying

I surrender.

Let no rebellion, hate or fear
Loosing the plans I hold so dear
Sudden failure of strength to care
Keep me from saying

I surrender.

Let no person, place or phone
Taint my sense of what I know
Keep from shouting, Where You Go I Go!
I say once more

I surrender.

For it is your way I want
Good Shepherd
Lord of All
Emmanuel

My way is not your way.
My plans are not your plans.
My thoughts are not your thoughts.

They are microscopic in comparison to the vastness of your being. You are great. My soul knows this full well.

I tremble when you come.
I shake in the presence of your glory.
There is no strength left when your hand rests upon me.

To only you, my God I surrender.

Even though it is daunting to think relinquishing the reins of my life to you means sacrifice.

You may take away my friends.
You may take away my family.
You may take away my home.
You may take away my health.
You may take away my job.
You may take away my relationship.
You may take away all that I love and cherish and

where I feel comfortable.

 

 

You may take away my life.

 

 

And yet…

 

 

I surrender.

Jesus, you gave up everything to give me life.
A life which is no longer mine.
It’s nice to think that it is.
Yes, it is a nice thought…

But my life is not truly my own.

 

I am yours and so is all that makes up “my life”.

The family is yours.
The friends are yours.
The home is yours.
The health is yours.
The job is yours.
The relationship is yours.
and all that I love…

They are all yours. Not truly mine.

But I am grateful you have allowed me to enjoy these beautiful gifts. Even if it is not forever.

I have come to understand that following you and kneeling before you means you may ask much of me, but it is not without an exchange.

Just because I give you my life does not mean I am with nothing.

There are so many treasures I have received from you. Friendship, Laughter, Joy, Freedom, Peace, Love, Sunsets, Apples, Prayers Answered, Starry Nights, Healing, Faith, Grace, Needs Met, Strength, Forgiveness, Scented Flowers, Random Acts of Kindness… and a relationship with a God who knows me.

And nothing is more satisfying than knowing Jesus.

Still, though you alone are enough, you promise me there is more to come. I cannot begin to imagine the good and perfect gifts you have ready for me as I give more to you. It will be beautiful.

I remember once you showed me a picture of the princess you have called me to become. A princess who wears her crown on the back of her head. You said if it is on the back, then the head must tilt down to balance it. A princess with her head bowed down is sign of submission and honor to one greater than herself. A sign of surrender.

Yes, my Father, I want to become a Princess of Surrender…. A Daughter of Obedience.

I surrender to a God who is Lord.
I surrender to a Savior who gave it all for me and who asks only my life in exchange.
I surrender to a Creator who makes beauty from ashes and riches from rags.
I surrender to a Protector who can be trusted with that which I give.
I surrender to a Father who will is so pleased when I say

I surrender.

Though it may not always be my first thought, I will continue to say I surrender, for truly you are the Lord of my life. It is the desire of my heart to want nothing more in this life than to follow you and give you my all.

Please remind me if I ever forget to sing you this song of surrender.

Not my will, but thy will be done.

Till the next chapter,
Katya